December 31, 2009

Looking Back at 2009

A ramble though the blog this year and the posts that stuck with me from those months:

I think I will always have a soft spot for the January post on naming Firefly. It was also the month I lost whatever shred of respect I still had for the agency we used for our first adoption. (Sadly, in my opinion, they only slid further off track as the year went on.)

February saw the start of the Open Adoption Bloggers list. We're now over one hundred bloggers, listed here and at Open Adoption Support! It was also the month Firefly turned two years old. Her birthday post still makes me cry, remembering.

In March we celebrated Firefly's birthday with Beth and I was reminded anew of what open adoption makes possible.

In April Firefly's birth father's secrets fell apart and his family's anger exploded all around us, an experience I wish I could forget. In the middle of all that I wrote out a list of things I enjoy about adoptive parenting that ended up being republished in a magazine--an honest-to-goodness paper one. Another experience I won't soon forget, but in a good way.

conversation with Puppy at a sunlit table on Mother's Day in May hit me a spot that was already tender, but may have been just what he needed right then.

The Open Adoption Roundtable started up in June talking about hindsight and fathers in open adoption. I have so enjoyed all the different perspectives that  have come out of those. My sincere thanks to every blogger who has participated thus far. Each of you brings a needed view to the table.

July in general is a bit of blur as I was still struggling a bit through my surgery recovery (and reading through many of your great book recommendations). I'm a little "meh" about most of July. Let's call it my sabbatical month.

August brought us lovely visits from Ray and Beth. And I revealed just how turned around we are about whether/how to try for a third child.

I closed out September with the written equivalent of an eye roll at the idea that my kids came to me via God's divine surrogacy program.

In October, Puppy turned four at an unblogged--but fabulous--race car birthday party complete with a cake depicting the big crash scene from the movie Cars, just as requested. In 3-D, even. And we abided with him through another year of not being acknowledged by his first families on his special day.

November gave us the first small steps in building a bridge across April's great divide, when Firefly's birth grandmother reached out to us through the agency. It's still an unfinished and unsturdy bridge--even shakier after someone knocked a chunk off of it this week, in fact--and we don't know what it will look like when it's complete. But we keep at it, slowly, in hopes that it will be meaningful for Firefly in the future.

Finally, this month some things tumbled out about finding my place in the complicated topic of hair in transracial adoption and started a conversation I hope I can continue into the new year.

Looking back, nothing terribly significant changed in our lives this year. Same jobs, same house, same spouse, same number of kids as we had this time last year. Frankly, I'm grateful for that. This year has rocked the worlds of so many people I care about--both online and off--robbing them of jobs and security and loved ones. May 2010 bring us all more joy, more health, more peace. There are good things in store for us all this year, I just know it.

5 comments:

SocialWrkr24/7 said...

Happy New Year Heather! I enjoyed this look back!

a Tonggu Momma said...

Happy New Year to one of my favorite adoption bloggers! Thanks for the look back - I especially remember your post listing the things you enjoy most about adoptive parenting.

Heather said...

Thanks, you two!

Tammy said...

Hi Heather! And Happy New Year! I certainly enjoyed your look back on your year. Thank you for this reflection. And I'm certain it feels like I've fallen off the face of the world but I'm still here reading, and reading most of what the open adoption roundtable peeps have to say as well. Reading, with not much energy right now to do my own reflecting, but praying and hoping that the New Year brings renewed health and energy for this side, and more writing. I sure hope so! Blessings to you and your beautiful family!

luna said...

quite a year! I'm happy to say I remember many of these posts. thanks for sharing a bit of your life here.

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