In the very beginning, it was stories that demystified open adoption for me and made it something I not only agreed with in principle, but really wanted for our family. Stories turned unknowns like "contact" and "visitation" into regular people sharing phone calls and meals.
Stories from other adoptive parents let me make sense of the role I play in our personal triads. The honest words of first parents make me more sensitive to my kids' birth families. Listening to the stories of adopted adults helps me to be--I hope--a more empathetic, aware parent with my kids.
When I've struggled with our own adoptive relationships, knowing there are other people who have faced the same worries has eased the loneliness. And when I stumble on a blog of someone who's been living open adoption for years and years? I'm almost turning cartwheels at all their insight into what lies ahead.
Beyond the sterile research studies and mass media pieces, I think it is our stories that show the world the reality of and reasons for what we do in open adoption. And that give us a sense of comraderie as we live out open adoption--something which is all at once completely normal and completely counter-cultural.
Which is why I have this little dream, a dream of starting up a blogroll just for us--a place for us to find each other and for others to find us. Writers from all sides of open adoption gathered together in one spot. A great big list of Open Adoption Blogs.
Would you like to join me? (And I really hope you do!)
I've created a space for our very own Open Adotion Blogroll. And with the help of Mel and of Kari at SugarB Studio, we even have some wonderful buttons to help spread the word. To join in, just grab the button code here and then add your blog.
I truly hope to gather as many voices as we can. No matter what open adoption looks like in your life right now--something joyful and easy, a struggle, a dream--if you embrace openness, your blog is welcome. Whether you write about adoption a lot or a little. Each of our stories sheds light on a different part of the whole.