August 29, 2011

Our Day With Ray

One of the things we got to do on our long road trip was see each of Eddi'es first parents. We live 1000 miles apart, so being together in person is always a treat. Todd took care of scheduling days, but we had Eddie decide how he wanted to spend the time. For our day with Ray, his first dad, he settled on a beach trip.

We met Ray in a parking lot about halfway between his house and where were staying and all piled into our car to drive to the beach. I feel like a broken record, I say this so often, but Eddie thinks Ray is the bee's knees. He loves him wholeheartedly.  He warmed right up to him as we stuffed ourselves into the car, me in the backseat between the kids in their carseats, Ray up front in the passanger seat.

Despite it being hot hot hot that week, the beach we went to was windy and downright not warm at first. The kids didn't seem to mind. Mari got right to work digging in the sand (she discovered a bitty plastic green army guy at some point, which pretty much made her day).


It was a pleasant day. We ate peanut butter and jelly sandwiches. Todd dug a big sand pit that the kids jumped into with glee. Mari dared to go into the water at one point, her first time touching the ocean. It even warmed up a bit when the wind stopped blowing. And Eddie was so very happy, there with "my Ray," as he calls him.


For a good stretch of the afternoon I sat on the blanket with Mari next to me in the sand, while Eddie, Todd and Ray explored the beach. I watched the three of them playing at the edge of the water, Eddie dancing and laughing in the waves. He would bounce around Ray, tugging at him, being goofy with him, enjoying Ray and the water and the sun as Todd and Ray talked over his head in the spaces between his words, as adults do. Bigger waves would come and Eddie would reach out for Todd's hand, seeking safety. I watched them for a long time like that, Eddie between his two fathers, finding his comfort and happiness in the space between them as he needed it. Contained in that moment, it felt simple. Relaxed. Right.


15 comments:

Zabet said...

Lovely. As an adoptive mom, I loved seeing this line "Eddie between his two fathers."

MrsH said...

beautiful, I hope one day my kids can know and love their birth father like that, though with regularly missed calls and visits, it's been very hard on them. I love having this image though as something to work towards, thank you!

mama2roo said...

Sounds like a great day. The kiddos are growing so fast--Eddie so handsome and Mari a beauty. Loving all the love between the boys/men. Makes me happy to watch from afar. <3

luna said...

love that last pic! such a beautiful moment. I'm so glad E got that. and you all too!

makingmonkeysoup.com said...

Looks like it was a great day. The kids are so adorable.

Sheeps Eating Me said...

Beautiful. Story and pictures both.

Rebecca Hawkes said...

I love, love, love this story! Open adoption can be such a simple, natural, and beautiful experience. "Relaxed. Right." Yes, exactly.
Rebecca Hawkes
www.rebeccahawkes.com

harriet glynn said...

I hope I get to that feeling. Sometimes I feel brief hopeful moments flicker by. But I'm often so invested in being the one and only. Can you email me the password? Love to see the photos! Anyway, wonderful post as always.

Monika said...

I <3 the way you write, and as a bmom in an open adoption, I hope that I will keep that relationship with my daughter and her mom & dad. *sigh* Beautiful pics, and I love your stories!

Jess said...

That picture is one for the baby/scrapbook. Lovely. I love how easy openness can feel. :)

Lavender Luz said...

The image of Eddie and his fathers says so much. As does your glee at him getting filled up by both of them.

What a wonderful day for all of you.

Lavender Luz said...

P.S. Your kids are gorgeous.

Kristin said...

I concur: your kids are gorgeous...and growing up so fast! And, your description of the day and the shot with E and his dads is so heartwarming. Thanks for sharing.

Meg said...

Love this post - letting Eddie choose how to spend the day together with his Ray. That photo at the end is so beautiful and full of love and connection. And oh my both kiddos are getting big!

ishouldreallybeworking.com said...

Great story!!! And HOW in the world did Mari get so big???

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