First, something I forgot to say (despite spewing out a million words) is that I left the adoption workshop that night feeling really grateful for our loose-knit, ameoba-ish adoption tribe we've got here online. I know we're all sort of learning as we go and it can feel like we're fumbling around in the dark sometimes. But the things we're saying to one another, the advice we give, the listening we're trying to do--we don't have all the answers (who does?), but I think we're on a good track. And I just wanted to say that to us.
(On a side note, when you're around a big group of other people connected to adoption, do you ever wonder if they read the same blogs you do? Because I totally do that.)
Second, Tammy mentioned trying to find some materials by Jane Brown. I've never had much success finding much more than promotional materials from groups sponsoring one of her adoption playshops. But I did find this article from her about talking with young children about adoption. It's a book guide for We See the Moon, so it's written with an eye toward international adoptions, but it has good general tips, too. If you don't want to read the whole thing, skip down to "Help Your Child Learn to Tell Their Own Story" and start from there.