In the meantime, I wanted to mention a book that coincidentally has come up half a dozen times online and in daily life in the past few weeks. Making Room in Our Hearts by Micky Duxbury is currently one of my go-to recommendations for anyone looking for a primer on open adoption.
Some of my favorite things about it:
- The author interviewed lots and lots of folks living out open adoption, including whole triad groups. Because it was written recently, she was able to include stories from open adoptions which are now decades old. I don't know about you, but I eat that stuff up.
- It is very practical and grounded. Duxbury is realistic about the limits of open adoption, but ultimately quite optimistic about its possibilities.
- It is much better at including voices of first parents (fathers, too) and adoptees than some of the other popular open adoption books.
- She is adamant about people needing adequate pre- and post-adoption support, which I think is so crucial and so often overlooked. Knowing what kinds of services we deserve enables us to speak up for ourselves.
I loaned my copy of Making Room in Our Hearts out last year and, sadly, it never returned to me. Isn't there an expression about only gifting books, never loaning them?