June 18, 2008

Hospital Room + Wireless

I'm not sure it's possible to be in a pediatric ward hearing a child cry and not have your heart feel like it is going to leap through your throat.

I've prayed a lot today for parents of super sick kids because, damn.

We've spent most of the day and now the night with Firefly at the hospital. She's okay, or rather she will be okay. Because if we were at okay already, we'd be home. But it's nothing too serious and she'll be better tomorrow. (Of course this morning they said she'd be better by tonight and obviously that didn't go so well.) My little girl is usually a blur of motion and coos and it is hard to see her so still and quiet.

When we found out she was going to be admitted, we debated for about one minute whether or not to call Ms B before deciding we would. We thought our stay would only be for the afternoon, but I still couldn't imagine telling her after the fact, "Oh, by the way, Firefly was in the hospital the other day." I would want to know if I were in her shoes.

It is hard to share news like this with first family, to hear the voice crack on the other end of the line and recognize their tears as the ones you would have if you heard your daughter was sick and knew you couldn't be there with her.

Ms B got some loving from her social worker at the agency (post-adoption support!) and checked in with us again this evening and was in a strong place. My mind has been focused on tending to Firefly and Puppy today, but right now in the darkened hospital room as Firefly sleeps it's poking at what it means to be entrusted with a child, to be caring for a life that was deliberately turned over to you, and whether there is extra responsibility there.

19 comments:

My name is Andy. said...

I hope firefly is okay and that you guys get home soon.


It's so great to see aparents who are concerned for first parents and keep them invovled! Good job.

Mindy said...

Praying for Firefly. Let us know when you're home and all's well again.

You already know this, but you made the right decision to call Ms. B sooner rather than later. I'm so glad she has good support from her SW.

Dawn said...

Glad it's nothing serious but hope you all come home SOON!

mama2roo said...

Praying you all get home soon. I can't imagine. ((Hugs)) to you all and Mrs. B.

cynthia said...

Oh dear, I hope you're all home very soon. Speedy recovery miss firefly,
xo Cynthia

Thanksgivingmom said...

I hope Firefly is home safe and sound now. I think it's awesome that you included Ms. B in sharing with her. I know how much that would mean to me. And rock on SW being supportive! Love that!

Megan said...

I hope that Firefly recovers quickly! I'm thinking good thoughts for all of you.

mayhem said...

Yikes! Glad the baby is okay. I'm sure it must be stressful, regardless.

Nine said...

Hi- found your blog via NCLM. I hope your daughter gets well very quickly!

Oceans... said...

So happy firefly is OK - Praying for all of you!

Minnie said...

I'm hoping for a speedy recovery for Firefly.

call me mama said...

Feel better firefly and get home soon!

Ariella said...

OMG what happend? I will pray for Firefly. Sending your whole family good thoughts and prayers.

Kendra said...

I hope she gets to "okay" as soon as possible. Thinking of you ~

susan said...

I hope you're both home, feeling better, soon.

Clementine said...

I'm so glad that Firefly is okay. That bug sounds really scary--I'm so glad she's feeling better.

PS--I'm with you on the extra responsibility thing. I think about that all the time.

Meg Jeske said...

Glad Firefly is doing better and you're home now (I read ahead!) Yay for reaching out and including Ms. B. I'm with you, I would want to know if I were in her shoes, and as an adoptive mom, I would choose to call too.

Cloudscome said...

I am so glad to hear she is OK. That must have been a harrowing experience.

shanamadele said...

Just catching up -- glad to hear that Firefly came through her illness okay. Also glad to hear that the agency was helpful. I hope I have my head together enough to call Butternut's firstmom if we face similar circumstances. I agree that entrustment brings an extra measure of responsibility to my parenting.

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