During tonight's bedtime kissfest with Puppy, I thought about how much it meant to me as a child to know my parents loved each other. Seeing the two people I most cared about treat each other well helped me feel secure. My world--my identity--revolved around them. Knowing they loved each other made me feel safe.
My thoughts drifted to the relationship T and I have with Puppy's first parents. It isn't the main focus of the adoption--Puppy is. But when we demonstrate mutual love and respect, I hope we create for him the same atmosphere I experienced as a child. Working on my friendship with them is an investment in him. I hope he can feel secure, knowing that the parents who created him and the parents who are raising him care about each other. I hope he doesn't ever worry that caring for one set of parents means hurting the other. I hope he can feel good about all the parts of him that come from K and R, because he's witnessed our appreciation for them.
I know I can't prevent all adoption-related struggles in Puppy's life. There's no form of adoption so "different" that it will make all the hard parts go away. But maybe tiny pieces can be a little bit easier.
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