Comments on Production, Not Reproduction | A blog about open adoption & host of Open Adoption Bloggers: Quick Birthday Follow-up

@DrSpouse - That's a really good question. I think...

2009-11-04T11:06:06.370-08:00

@DrSpouse - That's a really good question. I think it deserves a post of its own, though.

(by "this" of course I mean the whole situation, n...

2009-11-04T07:09:22.673-08:00

(by "this" of course I mean the whole situation, not the coming through with the phone call now...)

This must be so hard for you, given that your chil...

2009-11-04T07:08:26.954-08:00

This must be so hard for you, given that your children's birth parents are generally happy, nice people I gather, that you feel are safe around your children and have never done anything to hurt your children...

(sorry if that is a completely patronising classification!)

We're hopefully adopting a US domestic infant but with the environment here being that most children are removed from their birth parents not by choice and most children would therefore have very, very low expectations of their birth parents - and adoptive parents would have no reason to give their children any expectations, in fact it would be safer, well, not to make the birth parents sound "awful" but at least to tell children their birth parents don't really KNOW how to parent.

I am curious how you might handle this with your children when you don't really believe their birth parents are completely unable to parent, and therefore (at least in a child's view) should meet some of the standards children expect from adults (presents, reliability) but perhaps don't meet those?

It's def worth something! :)

2009-11-03T11:11:20.617-08:00

It's def worth something! :)

Slightly off subject...we had to make it a rule th...

2009-11-03T06:56:06.822-08:00

Slightly off subject...we had to make it a rule that children weren't allowed to discuss upcoming birthdays until a month before said birthday. This grew out of their starting planning next day for their next birthday, a mere 364 days away! Drove me insane.