tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-19220163.post2800772300511691136..comments2023-07-28T02:29:08.172-07:00Comments on Production, Not Reproduction | A blog about open adoption: It Came in a RushHeatherhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/05737780263679929983noreply@blogger.comBlogger14125tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-19220163.post-12922029713851718532011-06-20T07:41:50.524-07:002011-06-20T07:41:50.524-07:00Oh, Heather. wow. i'm sorry i'm coming to ...Oh, Heather. wow. i'm sorry i'm coming to this so late. i'm not reading online anymore (obsessed with photography). wish we could sit and chat in real life. big hugs.cynthiahttp://www.cynthiahenebryfilmphotography.comnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-19220163.post-18257462537699056272011-06-12T23:26:22.700-07:002011-06-12T23:26:22.700-07:00I'm so lucky that our foster kiddo's baby ...I'm so lucky that our foster kiddo's baby sister came to live with us just four months after she was born and that maybe, just possibly, we might get to keep them both. I know that lightning won't strike yet again and any more sibs probably won't end up with us, but it would KILL me to know that they were out there alone. Even if they weren't alone and even cherished. <br /><br />I don't know your story, but I can definitely understand how hard it is to know how to handle this situation. I wish you the best.Gracehttp://1tsp-grace.livejournal.com/noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-19220163.post-91454971222110069602011-06-11T01:58:23.028-07:002011-06-11T01:58:23.028-07:00(Arrived here from Mel's).
My goodness. Ther...(Arrived here from Mel's). <br /><br />My goodness. There's the saying, you can pick your friends but not your family. Boy does that apply in open adoption! <br /><br />I hope you find a way out of the tangle you feel you're in.Lut C.https://www.blogger.com/profile/03893061829410958985noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-19220163.post-42940577173634489642011-06-09T17:10:12.893-07:002011-06-09T17:10:12.893-07:00Since I first read this post, it has been tumbling...Since I first read this post, it has been tumbling around in my mind and I've written and erased this comment a few times. Because there are just no good words. No way to understand another person's decision. But I'm just thinking about all of you -- you and your kids and Kelly.Lollipop Goldsteinhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/01020874415819057995noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-19220163.post-14637478256479208632011-06-02T04:14:36.545-07:002011-06-02T04:14:36.545-07:00Gosh.
I have not shared much about the situations...Gosh.<br /><br />I have not shared much about the situations we have been shown so far, on my blog, but in one case there was at least one previously-placed child. Because we were given outline medical information, this included previous pregnancies and it included health/living situation for previous children. <br /><br />It seems really likely to me that the adopters of the new baby will have been given this information - as far as we can tell, adoption agencies seem to plagiarise each others' forms - so they all seem to have the same boxes on them.<br /><br />But how hard is that, we also thought about "what if" for this situation which in the end, wasn't for us, but we have no idea if the other adoptive parents would have been told about us - the expectant parents said they would like openness but I don't know if they managed to achieve it with the other adoptive parents.DrSpousehttps://www.blogger.com/profile/07259337858075146058noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-19220163.post-91305525124536232142011-06-01T19:54:24.646-07:002011-06-01T19:54:24.646-07:00Oh, Heather I hope that it does come out sooner ra...Oh, Heather I hope that it does come out sooner rather than later and in best possible way with the least amount of fall out and hurt feelings possible.<br /><br />I don't know Kelly at all, but just thinking about it and trying to give the benefit of the doubt I can see how I might have gotten into a similar situation. If I were get pregnant unexpectedly again I would be embarrassed and not want to tell people. The longer I went without telling the harder it would be to tell. Especially if the pregnancy resulted in another adoption. She may have ended up in a "I should have told them earlier...if i tell them now how will I explain why I didn't tell them earlier...I can't deal with this right now I'll tell them later..." lather rinse repeat...<br /><br />So glad Eddie has you there to tell him the truth now rather than later. Sending much love in y'alls general directionKatjaMichellehttp://therapyisexpensive.wordpress.comnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-19220163.post-25597324728526241242011-06-01T18:45:02.685-07:002011-06-01T18:45:02.685-07:00For me this post really captures one of the many h...For me this post really captures one of the many harsh realities of caring for and loving "other people's children". Just devastating. Just learning to walk with a vulnerable child through this scorched earth landscape must be incredibly difficult. Thank you for this post.TortoiseMumhttp://tortoisetales2.wordpress.com/noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-19220163.post-46020947288294205462011-06-01T12:37:59.045-07:002011-06-01T12:37:59.045-07:00I can completely understand making that promise wh...I can completely understand making that promise while thirsting for information.<br /><br />Oh, Heather, what a tough position the gparents have put you in. Why all the secrecy? That's kind of a rhetorical question.<br /><br />I'm sad for Eddie and all this means to him. You did a good job abiding with him.Lori Lavender Luzhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/15394441222262940632noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-19220163.post-32917927554572326272011-06-01T08:59:45.442-07:002011-06-01T08:59:45.442-07:00There are so many emotions swirling around this - ...There are so many emotions swirling around this - the way the news was delivered (and not delivered), the way "openness" varies so dramatically in it's interpretation, the language used, the impact on Eddie, the impact on his new sibling, the impact on YOU. Sigh. Life is sure messy. You're doing a great job managing it all Heather!Lorihttps://www.blogger.com/profile/15410002407855752531noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-19220163.post-50438839110939262462011-06-01T08:21:35.728-07:002011-06-01T08:21:35.728-07:00Grrr. Old version of Firefox ate my comment. Let&#...Grrr. Old version of Firefox ate my comment. Let's try this again...<br /><br />Amazing post - my breath literally caught in my throat the moment it dawned on me just what Kelly's mother's words meant. Of course you just instantly reply that you won't say anything, without having a chance to process. It's a gut reaction, but I can see the strain it places now in the wake of that revelation. I'm glad you shared the news with your son - it's important he know he has a brother out there. Thinking of you.Keikohttp://www.hannahweptsarahlaughed.comnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-19220163.post-75743509988193714632011-06-01T08:19:09.636-07:002011-06-01T08:19:09.636-07:00Oh, sweet little Eddie. He's such a lovely sen...Oh, sweet little Eddie. He's such a lovely sensitive soul. You're doing right by him, Heather.Lori Starknoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-19220163.post-83602910303487223332011-06-01T08:08:05.918-07:002011-06-01T08:08:05.918-07:00so sad for everyone, really. what a tough situati...so sad for everyone, really. what a tough situation. <br /><br />maybe there will come a day when you can revisit that promise with kelly's parents, in the interest of eddie.lunahttps://www.blogger.com/profile/15455301696832647867noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-19220163.post-78278803789075822882011-06-01T07:46:16.062-07:002011-06-01T07:46:16.062-07:00This comment has been removed by the author.Andyhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/00918826364837237450noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-19220163.post-85647342413033676922011-06-01T07:45:37.964-07:002011-06-01T07:45:37.964-07:00WOW! I can't imagine. I hope Eddie is okay. ...WOW! I can't imagine. I hope Eddie is okay. and you too.Andyhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/00918826364837237450noreply@blogger.com