Comments on Production, Not Reproduction | A blog about open adoption and home of Open Adoption Bloggers: Q&A: Dealing with the Wait

Thank you for writing this. I'm going to remember...

2008-07-25T15:34:00.000-07:00

Thank you for writing this. I'm going to remember these words...in the next phase. Right now, though, I'm in the "oh my god, it might happen TOO soon" panicking phase. We keep getting asked on a case-by-case basis by our agency if we want our profile sent out in instances that don't quite match up with what we specifiedc in our paperwork. And I panic every single time. We keep saying no -- mostly because of my husband, but partly because of me. I don't think I have completely come to terms that we are actually in the process of doing this. I'm trying to get through all of the summer stuff that we had planned, but then I keep remembering, "OH MY GOD, we need to get this house ready for a baby." It's surreal. Truly.

Bailan, I think you should have written the post y...

2008-07-24T10:05:00.000-07:00

Bailan, I think you should have written the post yourself. :)

Thanks so much for your thoughtful response, Heath...

2008-07-24T07:40:00.000-07:00

Thanks so much for your thoughtful response, Heather. What I'm slowly realizing as we're 6 months into our waiting process is that adoption seems to be an act of grace for everyone involved.

There's nothing we can do to "earn" parenthood, and I've never really believed that anyone "deserves" a child. So it doesn't really matter if I'll be a working mom, or if my husband and I are a bi-racial couple, or if we live in the city versus the suburbs. We can't change any of these characteristics to appear more or less attractive to any birthparents who may be consider placing their child with us. What we can do is surrender to waiting and remain hopeful that a birthparent will choose us. . .for us.

Bailan

thanks for this post. as someone who just ended m...

2008-07-23T12:26:00.000-07:00

thanks for this post. as someone who just ended more than 4 years of trying to conceive and is only now gearing up for a while new kind of wait, any tips on keeping sane and positive are helpful. thanks for sharing.

Thank you for this beautiful post. I always though...

2008-07-23T11:47:00.000-07:00

Thank you for this beautiful post. I always thought we were getting off the rollercoaster by stopping fertility treatments. It turns out we just got on a different rollercoaster...

I love your honesty, brutal or not, about this jou...

2008-07-23T06:46:00.000-07:00

I love your honesty, brutal or not, about this journey.
Thanks for continuing to share.